Hunter's 4th birthday party

This year for Hunter's birthday, instead of gifts, I just wanted people to write a note to Hunter. I bought a little journal (which I intend to use on all future birthdays-it was way better than gifts!) for people to write their feelings/memories about Hunter in. Everything shared was so sacred and beautiful.

Every birthday Hunter has is such a blessing! I cherish each one dearly.

It was so fun to spend an evening with Hunter as the center of attention, getting showered with love by his family. It was the perfect party.

Uncle Dave and Aunt Kim
Cousin Nash and little sis (being crazy)
Uncle Jon and Aunt Sarah
Uncle Ry-Ry
Dede
Soon-to-be Uncle Spencer and Aunt Laura
Grandpa Durrant
Grandma Janeen and baby sissy with Hunter's singing birthday bear (I was ready to strangle it after one day of nonstop "Happy birthday" over and over)

Ode to the KitchenAid

I conquered a mountain in my personal life today with a little help from the glorious invention shown below...(also known as my Mother's Day present) and made my first couple loaves of whole wheat BREAD!
Before I logged in to post/brag about this achievement I ate a slice with raspberry freezer jam and it actually tastes good too! I'm so proud of myself.

Ridiculously so.

My New Life

I watched a powerful video today. It starred Stephanie Nielson who was in a terrible plane crash in 2008. I believe the Lord knew I needed to hear what this beautiful woman had to say on the day before Mother's Day. I want to paraphrase some of what she says/writes in the clip.

today I woke up to rain
got up and did the rountine
i felt that familiar sadness
it was followed by a beautiful spiritual confirmation that this is my NEW LIFE
it is good
as women, we want to be beautiful and attractive
beauty and motherhood are one
i'm grateful I'm here on this earth and that I have the opportunity to be a mother
i view my role now as more divine
it's a priviledge

I couldn't stop the tears from rolling down my cheeks. I think it is natural to have a plan for our lives. Even though we are taught from an early age that trials are a universal part of our mortal existence, I believe it is dangerously easy to begin thinking that if a person is righteous the Lord will "bless" them and spare them any serious difficulty. Hence, no need to include any challenges in that "plan". (Phew!) I think one of the hardest things I've ever had to do (and I think this is true for many people) was accept the NEW LIFE Heavenly Father had for me, and to be able to say, it is good. I know that the challenge of having a disabled child has made me eternally grateful for every second I am given with my precious children in this life. I'm humbled that He would trust me with His precious spirits. A deep, sweet testimony about my role as a mother has given my life different meaning than it had before. The difficulties that I've passed through have been worth the earning of that testimony.

To see the clip go to http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KHDvxPjsm8E&feature=player_embedded

Baby Bennett III

Birthday on the way!

Another year has passed! Another birthday video to commemorate it has been completed.

So much of what is in my heart is expressed perfectly by the song and pictures in this video. I feel like the Lord and I have wrestled a lot this year as I've learned (and re-learned) lessons about Hunter and his life and my role as his parent. I know Hunter enjoys having a body and being part of a family. He isn't just languishing in his disability like I think some people believe.

I can't (and don't want to try to) imagine our life without Hunter. I'm amazed at how well the Lord knows us and the challenges that will help us become more like Him and the Savior. I'm grateful for the sanctifying influence Hunter has had on my marriage. The things Bryson and I have endured as Hunter's parents have knitted our hearts together in sacred, eternal ways. I'm thankful I've been present to witness Eleyna hurrying to comfort Hunter when he coughs or trying to share food and toys with him. I can't imagine anything worth missing those moments for. Eleyna is unaware that her brother is disabled and it is beautiful to me.

I'm grateful for the Lord's patience with me when momentary bitterness, pettiness, envy, or discourgement catch me in a moment of weakness. It seems like those times when I'm hurting and unreasonable (and probably don't deserve much more than a spanking), He finds a way to let me know He's there and He loves me.

I love my son with all my heart. Happy birthday Hunter bug!

Make an on-line slideshow at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Easter fun

On Easter Sunday, in between sessions, we made a quick trip over to Grandma Janeen's for some lunch and Easter baskets. Since Hunter was still feeling yucky just Eleyna and I went while the boys stayed home. Eleyna loves spending time at Janeen's! She plays with Grandma's dollies and out in the sandbox and thinks she's in heaven.Janeen's parents were in town for conference so Eleyna got to spend some time with her great-grandparents. Her and Grandpa Rassmussen had lots of fun playing puzzles.

For Easter we got Eleyna and Hunter some baby ducks.

They live in our garage right now in a cardboard box. I can't believe how quickly they are growing! New living arrangements may be required in the near future. We named them Blackie and Maddy.

Eleyna's interest level has been pretty consistent. She is still too nervous to hold them. I love the way she refers to them cause it comes out sounding like "gucks" instead of ducks.

She really likes watching them swim. She has to be in the tub with them since watching from the other side of the tub just doesn't give her a close enough view. :)

Las Vegas vacation

Last week, Bryson had a conference for work in Las Vegas and at the last minute we decided to tag along. My dad was going to the conference too, so my parents scheduled their Marriot time share for that week so my mom and sibs could go down and play. Only Ryan and Deanna were able to go so there was plenty of room for me and the kids at the hotel. It worked out great. The ride down was fairly painless. While the boys were at the conference during the day, me, mom, Dede, Ry and the kids got to hang out. It was okay weather. Not really warm enough to spend a lot of time poolside, but we did have one day in the mid-sixties that felt like heaven after a long winter. The girls in the hotel shuttle on our way to the grocery store.

Whenever we're in Vegas we get to visit Grandpa Brad's house.

On our way to the pool. I love how happy Eleyna's face is.

On the drive home we stopped at the Pirate Island in St. George for lunch.

My little pirate princess.